Cry by Rihanna... a damn nice song that i cant stop letting it play in my mind... coz as usual, im a victim who suffers from a broken heart... i feel like im being used by the person i like... and im so blind to follow suit and play along... why? why am i so stupid??? "wake up from this dream Amber... he doesnt appreciate you"... everyone told me that...

Should i tell myself that?

I dunno, i cant stop crying...

Zzzzz... i just knew the meaning of diao not so long ago... and i was a bit... embarrassed that im such a noob about not knowing about this sort of thing... gah... i went around asking my friends in campus what diao means, and surprisingly, not many wanted to answer me but asked me to look it up on the internet. I asked a close friend of mine and he said it means 'cool' because Jay Chou popularized it to be that way... so yea... COOL... but then, looked up on the internet... it means penis... WTF... no wonder my brother asked me not to say that word in public coz people might get sensitive about it... omg... omg... im in deep shit... zzzz... joking...

This is taken from Jay-Chou.net forums:

DIAO

literal meaning: penis
colloquial meaning: cool / outrageous
Chinese character: 屌
Han Yu Pin Yin/Mandarin: diao3 - diao in third tone
Cantonese pronunciation: diu/dieu/diew (however you want to romanize it) - higher tone than Mandarin *note this is a swear word in Cantonese, so don't use it the way Jay does

Jay uses the word "diao" for the slang definition, meaning "cool". For his expression "diao bu diao", it basically just means "cool or what?".

Then from Time Asia.com:

Finally, he leans in close: "Let me tell you about diao."

Diao is a Taiwanese slang usually translated as "cool" or "outrageous." It literally means "penis."

"It's my personal philosophy," he explains, "but it has nothing to do with religion. It means that whatever you do, you don't try to follow others. Go your own way, you know?"

He sits back, shakes his hair out of his eyes and nods. This is serious. This is deep. This is the metaphysical mechanism that he feels explains his pop stardom, as opposed to his musical talent. "It's like, the ability to shock. The way I think of shocking people is to do things that people don't expect in my music, in my performances. Like during my first Taipei show last year, I was performing Long Quan (Dragon Fist) [Chou's favorite tune from his Eight Dimensions CD] and I took off on a harness and flew out over the audience. That was diao."

Diao is an internal process, a mystical path that makes extreme demands and forces stringent measures. It requires, mysteriously, that Chou forgo wearing underwear, a lifestyle choice that is endlessly vexing to his mother. "He used to wear underwear as a child," she sighs. "Maybe it is something he started since working with Jacky Wu." Chou himself will not elaborate. The diao that can be spoken of, apparently, is not the eternal diao.

The diao, of course, has made him wealthy, a millionaire, but he insists all that is a distraction.

Diao can make people rich??? zzzz...

In Kuching, try saying diao to the nearest guy you meet and the next thing before you know it, you are in the big monsoon drain, drinking those foul putrid air longkang... and you're never gonna get rich by saying that here. In Taiwan, say diao and you're the coolest person on earth... wahhhh... im the diao-est person on earth!!!

So from this diao-ing experience, i finally derived what it is all about... the context of using diao is the same as using nigga... in Taiwan, it is acceptable for people to say diao to whomever and whenever they like... just like the blacks in America can say nigga to any fellow African Americans around... but if someone else who is not from the same 'species' says diao or nigga? He might just end up being slapped at the face... or worse... dead from some stray bullet that only God knows where it came from... zzzz... so the dangers of this two words are unprecedented... this is why... NEVER FOLLOW SLANGS... buh... slangs are common in some cultures but may be bad in others... so yea... watch your mouth when you're speaking...

The last thing you wanna hear from someone right now is... 'I have the diao-est diao diao-ing in this diao diao world...' or someone humming to 'diao diao diao diao diao diao diao diao...' try humming it to Jay's Huo Yan Jia song...... =_= i know im lame... but diao-ing is so not my thing... diuuuuuuu

sorry JAY... but i still love your music and you as well... ^^ Jay fan forever... =D

In Berberboo's mind: And i always thought diao was to slap someone... omg, how noob can i get?

Sorry peoples!!! I havent been updating my blog for these few days because:

1. I had a really bad connection... a million thanks to Streamyx... i cant get on my msn or update my blog at all... kudos to all those TM people, thanks for making my life a hell...
2. I needed to help my friends in their assignment... which thank God had been passed up on Friday, so im free now...
3. I have no idea to blog because my mind has been corrupted by thoughts i dont want to be reality... read my personal blog if you have access to it... sighs...
4. My laptop needed to go for operation... overworked my RAM so it couldnt start up well, or jammed everytime i switch it on... zzzz... now using my desktop which is so... EMPTY except games... bleh

So yea... im back to blogging... for the time being that is... wanna tell the world so many things but then... i needed to shut myself up on certain things and remain it as private property with less intrusion... i need to shut my world from lots of outsiders to remain in secrecy and less heard... gah... enough blabbing...

I went to a new joint called Chicago 7 a few days ago while at gym... a famous fast food joint in the United States, this is the first branch opened in Malaysia... or so in Kuching la... my brother tried the food there a few times and recommended a few things... so yea, i needed to try it too...


My brother's hot dog... i forgot what they called it la... cant remember the name... sighs... i had Bar-B-Q Cow... looks like any other ordinary beef burger... but taste extremely good... coz its juicier and meatier compared to other beef burgers from other fast food chains... ^^


French fries with cheese sauce... haha... i love their fries... home made... and chunky... and nice!!! Cheese sauce is savory... ahhhh... love it...


My vanilla latte... i thought it was supposed to be cold... but the noob in me didnt realised that what i ordered is under hot drinks... zzzz... im so blur these few days... sighs

My final verdict of the place? GOOD PLACE TO EAT... coz the price of the food there is reasonable... and can say its worth it for the price la... but the drinks are a rip-off. Not to say it sucks, but the price is overpriced... so that sucks... haha

Then... my mum bought something i havent had in ages today... SNAILS!!!


Burit snails... or thats what i call them since young... haha... it looks like someone's round ass... mwahahaha...


Some long snail... haha... taste chewy... blehhh

Well, i left them there for the whole afternoon coz my family and i went for a family photo shoot in the studio in the afternoon... sighs... i hate shooting family photos... i look freaking retarded coz the photos my parents chose for publishing only suit their faces... i mean... only when they look good in it... shit la... but who cares, they paid for it anyways... so let them be happy la... will show the studio pics once i get them next week... sighs...

So after coming back from photo shoot and church and bla bla... went home to cook the snails for supper... and to my horror, they were all over the place!!!


They flooded my sink!!! OMG!!! But who cares, they gonna end up being cooked anyways...


Cooked snail meat... i needed to dig them out with needles... haha... tedious but i love it... chewy chewy snail meat... =D

Dont throw out when you see the pics okay? Snails are food too... ^^ but Hock got so scared... haha... blehhh...


Random shoot at the dark studio... zzz... my camera sucks la... my brother said im dressing like an Ah Lian already... just need to dye my hair and ta-dah... im an Ah Lian... wtf... i dont wanna be one... zzzz


My pimplish face due to stress and lack of sleep... sighs... i dont wanna sacrifice myself anymore... wtf...

Back to my life... i was so stressed out lately, i havent been sleeping much, i have frequent headaches, been vomiting like nuts if i stare at the comp screen too long... haiz... so many outcomes... just for the sake of sacrificing... should i do this again? SHOULD I? No one seems to care... except Shawn and Bubu... he doesnt even bother to appreciate the effort, but giving me the cold shoulders once its over... well, thats it... its the final straw... buh

Im stressing myself out for the wrong reason... and i dont wanna do it anymore... not when im jeopardizing my health in the making... wtf... get on with life... yea, i will...

And Kari dear, i cant camwhore much ok? Look damn ugly now... sighs... but miss you la dear... will be back on MSN once my laptop is fixed...

In Berberboo's mind: I made the wrong choice when i fell for someone im not supposed to... and now i realized it, it isnt too late... walk by and never look back...

Yes, im officially broke... zzzz... i just spent like 350 bucks last week and there goes my pocket money for January... sighs... and some more we are having an economy recession... can die arr... i need a new resolution from now onwards so that i can save money for future use... so so... what can i do arr??? shit, im at world's end... dead meat... neh, i will figure a way out... from today onwards, dont spend more than 30 bucks on food for a week... usually i spend like 50 bucks plus a week on food? zzz... im a pig i know... eat all the time, ngek ngek... the, i have to refrain myself from buying any more clothes till next year, and this includes dresses!!!, shirts, skirts, jeans, high heels, slippers and yada yada... and also... i need to travel less too so that i can save on petrol... will only drive to and fro college and gym... will not bother to let anyone hitch hike anymore unless its of valid reason... go out? let bf pick... MWAHAHAHA... joking la, take turns... erm... my prepaid bills? erm... limit myself to 30 bucks a month... usually i spend about 70 bucks a month for mobile phone bills... zzz... dont blame me la... i text about 30 messages every day... zzzz... i wont reply to non-urgent messages anymore... please state the importance or i wont bother to reply, okay? needa save money drastically... what other ways hor? OH YA, no more buying of plushies anymore!!! seriously, i dont have place to put them coz buying a coffin needs money again... sighs... so yea, no more ok? and erm... i dont know what to do liaw... sighs... hope my money-saving resolution can work la... shit... i have a goal of saving 5 k this year... that excludes my tuition fees la... i mean from pocket money and earnings from blogging and coming soon ang pows... hahaha... till then.... i needa starve... zzz... bye bye

Yesterday, i had a wonderful day. Extremely wonderful that is... i cut my hair... AGAIN... in the morning, then i had to meet up with Fred Loh, who came back from NZ (wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee), then i had a change of opinion about studying Mechatronics after hearing the Engineering Talk in school, reconciling with a friend, and celebrating his birthday at night... ^^ How bad could a day gets to be when im living in it? Nah, not bad at all... one hell of a good one actually. So yea... lets recap!!!

I cut my hair in the morning... well, i wasnt supposed to cut but then my mum insisted coz my old hair looked messy, so she asked the barber to sort of trim everywhere... and yea, he did... cut about 1-2 inch everywhere... and the outcome? I have shorter front hair and everywhere... zzzz. I cant tie up my hair anymore... nor can i put my front hair behind my ears... sighs...


Dont blame my photo quality for yesterday coz i seriously forgot to change to the 5 mp mode... was using MMS mode all day... DAMMIT... how could i be so fucking stupid? Man, sometimes i hate myself for being so forgetful... sighs... anyways, thats my new hair-do, shorter fringe and length everywhere... but dont see much difference unless you look properly that is... buh

So yea, met up with Fred at The Spring... ^^ and... WE HAD SUSHI KING AGAIN!!! WHEEEEEEEEEEE!!! had to try different things this time so i ordered a different set of food compared to previous one. ^^ While waiting, we chatted and camwhored as usual... =D


Shawn and Mr. Loh... haha... he is soooooo thinnnnnnnn now..... and he kept saying im thin instead... sighs... OH YEA... HE GREW TALLER FROM THE LAST TIME WE SAW EACH OTHER... I MEAN REALLY TALLER!!! ^^


Chee Cheng and Siaw Yin... ^^ our lovely gang... buh buh...


And a thick-skin shot from Fred's phone of me!!! zzzz... what to do, damn nice to camwhore right? lol...

Food pics are a must in a blogger's life... ^^


Yatsei Tempura... or vegetable tempura... lolz...


Some Soba mee that Chee Cheng ordered... cant remember the name... sighs...


Shawn's potato balls... or so i think it is... haha


Some Japanese noodles but i swear it tastes like mee sua, so i will call it Japanese Mee Sua then... ^^


And unagi with rice and egg... Siaw Yin's... =D


Raw pickled octopus legs sushi... damn nice can!!! very chewy chewy and elastic and crunchy... ahhhh... i want more... but 4 bucks a plate man... so expensive!!!


And seasoned scallops sushi... ahhh... i always love this kind... *hearts*

So we eat and eat and eat... haha... THANK GOD I DIDNT FALL AT SUSHI KING THIS TIME!!! extreme precaution about the uneven steps now... ^^, then... we walked around... then we headed back to Swinburne to give Fred a tour around campus... hihihi... but i needed to meet with someone so i escaped to the computer lab and let Shawn do all the touring... sorry yea Fred... =X

But before he headed home, we still got the chance to camwhore outside the 5th floor corridor... hihi... fun o...


Fred and I... peace babeh!!!


Fred is still shorter than Shawn... hihihi... blekkk...


Zzzz... im still so short... sighs sighs... nevermind, this picture is like menaiki tangga berlubang like that... mwahahahaha...


Peace-ing (pissing) overloaded... hahahaha... Fred refuse to show the peace sign... buh Fred buh...


Crouching down like a bunch of criminals... waiting for the self-timer to take a pic... 3... 2... 1... SNAP!!!


The kegilababian never ends... mwahaha... blehhhh


And then... we had a group hug!!! Awww... loves loves Fred... =D haha... credits to Siaw Yin for being the photographer of the day... ^^

So after all the camwhoring hiatus at the 5th floor corridor... Fred went home... i hope he knew the way back though... haha... i hope we get to meet up again and this time... BRING ZAKIL AND JEROMEY ALONG TOO... ^^ and then we went for the Engineering talk a floor below... my opinion about Mechatronics engineering changed towards a whole new direction... it seems so fun to create robots and such... haha... i might diversify my opinions for now... =X but for EnE engineering? Neh, dont bother to try...

Then at night... attended someone's coming of age at Pizza Hut. Yea, Larry turned 19 yesterday... woot... so old already... hihihi... i didnt take much photos coz i know they will be pissed if i blog about it but hey, a few wont hurt kan? haha...


Larry... snapping a photo of me...


Snapping a photo of him... haha... pardon Ben's blur look... he didnt managed to escape from our camera shutter speed. ^^ dont ask me why im sitting next to him... they planned it so... zzzz... anyways, he served me whole night... so ive got nothing to complain about except blushing and saying thanks and saying dont want and bla bla... haha... thanks ya... and his face turn red when he ate that spicy pizza... mwahahaha... i should have snap a photo but didnt dare... sighs...


The birthday boy cutting his birthday cake... and yea, we dont have to sing birthday songs for him because there was a kids birthday party being held upstairs so they played the birthday song already... mwahahaha.... and on his cake was written the words... "Stupid Larry" hahaha... cute right? =D i didnt managed to get a photo of it because i wasnt that enthusiastic to take so many photos coz i wasnt feeling well... =( i regret it now... haha... nevermind la... if we get to meet up for the next birthday, i wont hesitate for pictures anymore... =D

They splat his face with cake after that... for the first time in my life, i thought only girls will do that, but guys also has the same habit... so yea... I DID LAUGH... ^^


Group photo... haha... you cant see me in the photo coz face it, i preferred not to be seen amongst the group of guys... incase some people might get annoyed... haha... but i think my photos have been taken by some cameras that night coz i know there was snapping sounds and flashes everywhere, but heck... nevermind la... haha... i didnt look that shabby that night either... i dont wanna name any names here... those who knows will know la... haha...... i dont need to name all the boys in the pic right? you know them already la... ^^ hehe... friends forever ya!!!

Then after talking and eating and merry making... we went to have a after-meal stroll at Jalan Song... ahaha... went to see Ah Hock's dad, then went to the pet shop (i was laughing my head off at a puppy who looks like a pig coz seriously, it has those black spots and its pink in color!!!) and then see some mop demonstration which in my surprise, we stood there for like 10 mins to listen to the guy crapping coz someone seems to be interested in the mop... haha... i should have suggested to go to Friendship Park la... but then... not feeling well, so... we dispersed... HY send me home and the rest went back to the hostel to celebrate again... or dunno la what they were up to... =X

Went back home to have a rest, chat online for a while and then sleep... hehe... i had a wonderful day yesterday... and i shall never forget it... =D

But the celaka thing about all this happiness is... MONEY!!! for this week alone, i spent like over 350 bucks on food and gifts... wah lao... die lar if life goes on like this... and for this statement... I HAVE TO AGREE... THAT MONEY INDEED CAN BUY HAPPINESS!!! =__=

But happiness is the most important thing in life... so... heck i dont bother about money... zzzz

LOVE MY FRIENDS A LOT!!! muaks muaks!!!

and for today, happy 19th Norman!!! =D

In Berberboo's mind: I hope he doesnt need to go away soon... coz i will miss him... haha...

Erm... anyone out there??? Can anyone tell me how to shut down my Advertlets account? Im not earning anything from there and ive removed their ads for weeks already... and i wanna shut down the account coz im not using it anymore... but i dont see any tools or options for me to do so in their website... so what should i do? I prefer Nuffnang coz their ads give me a better earning e.g. RM2.70 a week compared to Advertlets's RM0.01 a week. ANYONE HELP???

I celebrated my legality yesterday, 14th January with my friends at The Spring. My first time there, i was sort of being the epitome of sakainess... haha... i was like a little baby being left in the middle of the road... coz... it was fucking packed and fast-paced... i mean people were walking in all direction... regardless whether they are any shops at those corners... zzzz... what has Kuching people turned into??? Since when do we hoard places like sardines in a can? Sighs... nevermind... im an anchovy stucked in between. ^^

So okay, back to my big 18. I walked over to Spring with my buddies, Shawn, Siaw Yin, Chee Cheng and Chin Fong. The weather was freaking hot and yea, i did get sunburnt... haha... i can feel the skin peeling on my face... eww eww... reached Spring slightly before 12 coz we had extra hour class with Miss Kang. Buh... hate study info... gonna fail big time... =X

I enter Spring... i saw Starbucks and Secret Recipe greeting me. OO... the joy i felt was like i was in KL for the holidays... haha... nice one... saw a few high end shops which i think might burn out our pocket money. Zzzz... imagine la... one piece of clothe cost about 100 bucks... and thats just a spaghetti top... omg... thats a rip off... well... we went to survey the entire place before started shopping our hours away. In a matter of fact, im the one who was shopping and the rest just sort of accompany me and do the carrying and answering my questions. Lols... sorry yea guys!!! I know im quite a shopper these days but i still spend very little ok? Haha... im very pleased with my purchase. Anyways, its free coz daddy gave me money for shopping as a birthday present... so oh wells... ^^


I fell in love with this the moment i saw it... loves loves flowers... awwww


The so called Chinese New Year decoration on the ceiling, or so i think it is...


Beautiful colored plates... the beauty only to be destroyed by uncivilized people who think that those are their wishing wells where they can throw their coins in for luck... buh... moronic...


And for me, no shopping complex is complete without a toy/gift shop... ^^

After tired hours of shopping, we decided to eat lunch coz someone was sooo hungry till i need to halt my shopping spree for an hour or so. Lol.


Sushi King... we had our lunch here... coz i refused to let some people chia me to eat... haha... sorry yea, its not my moral principle to do so... =X dont feel insulted or what, ok?


Some black pepper i dont know what this is... =_= Chee Cheng's...


Some chicken biri-biri thingy that Siaw Yin, Shawn and Chin Fong had... i swear i thought that was milk in a bowl... till i asked them... haha... coz mine was the slowest to come... =__= but the thing turned out to be very nice... haha... steam eggs... and seafood at the bottom...


And my fry set... uh... i really dont know what was so hard to cook this... haha... so in the end, i played around with my food before eating... you know la, savor the moment of lateness...


My culinary skills... cute right? ^^


Shawn's croquette... haha... 6.90 man...


My fried octopus which i think Ropa would kill me for... lolz...


Guess what is this? I swear in the picture it looks like a lit candle on a table but it is in fact a light bulb hanging over me... nice aight?

So yea... after the expensive lunch... went back to shopping again... haha... tried on a few dresses... buh... and camwhore with them too... bleh... im an arse, i know i know...


Some short dress that made me look so fat... wait, I AM FAT... look at my humongous thighs... mwahahaha... =__='


A beige button down dress that was sold with a 50% discount... haha... cheap eh?


Tried on the grey one... looks so much better in it... haha... but i dont wanna spend my money on something that expensive... i have a budget of 50 bucks per piece of clothing... haha...


This dress made my bust looked so damn big... grrr... and it costs like 53 bucks... buhh...


But in the end, i ended up getting this dress... for 42 bucks... damn worth it can... haha... i look okay in it too... gonna wear it soon... hihihi...

Overall... i spent like 150 bucks on everything... excluding food la... but for 6 pieces of clothing... i guess its worth it lo... ^^


We had Starbucks Caramel Frappucino before we left... 3 cups for 3 person... haha... coz Chee Cheng and Chin Fong left earlier coz they wanna sort out their stuff... so yea... left the 3 of us... dammit la... Starbucks so expensive... 40 BUCKS FOR 3 DRINKS... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Hihi... i love the surprises... but talk about them later... that night... went to eat with family... suppose to go and eat at Magenta, but too bad it was close... then tried My Restaurant... closed too!!! In the end, ended up in Sahara... but it was okay, worth it... and still cheaper than other food eateries in that standard... hahaha...

We had: (sorry for bad pictures, had to switch off the flash)


Fish and chips... can say its the best in town so far... =D


Oxtail stew... you wouldnt know it was oxtail... haha... taste a lot like lamb shank... =__= but good though... ^^


There is always Chicken Corden Bleu... now there is PORK CORDEN BLEU... omg... i cant live without pork... ^^


Mix grill... erm... taste good... but not recommendable coz the portion was too little for comforts... haha...


Spaghetti Aglio Olio... ahahaha.... very nice one... ^^

I had a very enjoyable dinner at Sahara... with the nice ambience and soft music... i feel like sleeping ever so often... =D

So... i went home... and finally sort out the stuff i bought... hihihi... got gifts this year... something that i never expected... well, got 3 plushies!!! muahahaha... im shooooo happppiiiieee!!! And got some clothes with the money dad gave me... =D

Im a happy girl... oopsss... WOMAN!!! HAHA...


I wanna thank Rosemary and Cherry for the puppy... ^^

I wanna thank the Sibu dudes (WHY, Ben, Larry, ZJ, Mike, Hock) for the big teddy... ^^

I wanna thank my bro for the penguin... haha... at least Patrick wont be lonely anymore... =D

Thank mum and dad for money...

Thank Shawn, Siaw Yin, Chee Cheng and Chin Fong for accompanying me whole day.

AND THANKS TO ALL THOSE WHO SENT ME TEXT MESSAGES, FRIENDSTER COMMENTS, BLOG COMMENTS AND ALL THOSE WHO WISHED ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! THANKS A LOT GUYS... MUAKS MUAKS... IM FINALLY LEGAL... AND IM IN DA CLUB OF 18's!!! YAY!!!


Thanks for all the wonderful memories you guys gave me on this huge huge occasion... although 18 is just another figure in my life, i did enjoy my first day of turning 18... soo many sweet memories to cherish... and also some bitter ones la... haha...


Firstly , i fell in Sushi King in the Spring and i cut my thighs... ouch it hurts man... damn... everyone saw me... zzzz... i have ugly fat thighs... haha... =_=


This picture is shoooo cuteeeee.... hahaha... like i said, sha zhu is handicapped without her sha ye zhu... so... im hopeless in my 18th year... lol... joking!!!

Haha... getting a cut on my birthday is alright i guess... not much of an embarassment... but guess what, i langgar somebody's behind today... needa pay 150 bucks for repair but my car wasnt even touched at all... coz... MY BESI KUAT!!! MWAHAHA... but choi choi... dont want to get into accidents anymore... already kena nuclear bomb from my parents just now... and a reminder, do not drive when your having a bad headache.

HAHA!!!

In Berberboo's mind: Im useless today... dont know why i cant do much at all... sigh... and someone got me blushing on my birthday... i was so red in the face till i got a fever... haha... oh come one, how could i resist such hot person? lol

I think i have a fetish for dresses now... every time i come online, i will always google up about dresses and also looking through ebay to see any nice dresses selling off at cheap prices... and yea, there are so many choices i think i can get broke damn easily if i didnt control the urge to blindly buy things online. Hahaha. And since i 'heard' The Spring sells many dresses, i think erm... i needa save more money lo... shit... i want to look for 2 kinds of dresses but i cant find it in Kuching le. I NEED KL!!!

Why do i suddenly have that fetish for dresses? Maybe coz im growing bigger and more maturely? NEH... im still a childish pig at heart... sha zhu... haha... i love that phrase... ngek ngek... well anyways, the reason i wanna wear dresses is because that i feel bored with my wardrobe... and i seriously wanna flush out all those normal tops that my MOM bought for me when i was like 8? Gah... i tell you i still keep a lot of clothes form my childhood days coz my mum believed that i might 'grow' smaller and can re-fit in them back since its a waste to give them away. And also, being slimmer means i can fit in much more clothes and wheeee... can wear many many things without worrying about those elephant legs and bulges... *pouts* i still have huge legs though... but its those kind of sportswoman kind of legs... you know... tennis players legs as what Shawn calls them... haha... muscly... but dang la... i needa cut down on building muscly legs... and torso too... if not my boobies will shrink to a mere A. =__= but anyways, its good to have goals in life right? haha... and wearing dresses makes me look more feminine? erm... dont think i look gentle... since im called aggressive by numerous numbers of guys... heck dresses wont make any difference... all the better for people to goggle at my boobies... bleh... perverts and all, it isnt that big ok? but bloody son of a bitch construction workers cant leave me alone everytime i park at the new parking block... im darn scared ok? Can someone pei me neh? Im afraid... =( so yea... but i still wanna wear dresses... buh

Buh... im looking for these kinds... seen any?


Yea... i so want the black one... =__= but i think i will look weird in it since i have broad shoulders and im not that busty... but its worth the shot right? i got something similar to the pink one except that it isnt spaghetti strips but more of a halter neck... zzzz... anyways... i still wanna look for them around town and my budget is 100-150 bucks... can i find it? U h-uh...


And i look so blur these days la... i dont wanna grow old... sighs... one more day...

In Berberboo's mind: Please dont stuck me up... you wouldnt want to do that, dont you?

Sighs... a few more days to go baby!!! Woot woot, then im legal to do everything i want to... but with restrictions from parents, as always... been given more freedom i guess, but then, im still subjected to lots and lots of restrictions. Haha. I still cant have a foochow boyfriend... ahem... and that stays till im big too... erm... then... i cant club, drink, smoke, do drugs, have sex and so on... but hell yea... i understand that... i dont do any of those at all... and i dont intend to... ^^ im an angel, arent i? LOL...

So okay, let me see what ive done throughout my 18 years living... ermmm

I was born to this world at approximately 8.35 am... and like a red piece of meat, i screamed at the doctor at the top of my lungs.

When i was 1, i learn to shuffle on my backside to maneuver around the house... wow yea... thats a really big accomplishment...

At 2, i learnt to speak and walk and half a huge jambul on my head, i mean my hair only started growing at 2 and hell, it was so mohawky back then... attended pre-school at Nazareth's...

At 3, i went to Kids Eden day care, where i met Izzudin and the rest of the people whom i know for very long... and that place has been my second sanctuary that i call home for the next 11 years...

Bla bla bla... i couldnt remembered much... but let me tell you the ones that i can remember very well... in random sequence la... not following my age okay?

Bit a girl at 5... or was i younger?

Watch IT... some clown-turn-alien show which still taunts me till now... since then i was afraid to go to the bathroom alone... and i still have that phobia now... coz... IT EATS YOUR LIVER!!!

Went to Sibu and ate the most expensive fish ever...

Had my first kiss (accidentally) when i was 8... fuck la... celaka punya boy, i still remember him... he was running and he didnt see me... so when he bumped into me... he just automatically... ahh... you know what happened then...

Get into huge huge trouble in primary 6 where the Headmaster and Disciplinary teacher had to call my parents in. I swear i was almost sent to a mental hospital... haha... but then, its an awakening incident... thats why, never trust people so much...

Stole money from parents at the age of 10... stole about 1k i think... and spent it all on stickers and comic books... GAH... SO STUPID!!!

Started to look at the opposite sex at the age of 11.

Started to grow boobies at the age of 12.

Grew fatter at 8 years old, turned obese, had double and triple chins and never slimmed down till now.

Sprained my ankle twice... in primary school...

Broke my right arm in Primary 5...

Was one hell of an artist back then... won numerous art competitions...

Like somebody truthfully for the first time in Form 2.

Started dating in Form 3.

Get lots of heartbreaks after the first guy.

Never found the one i like so much anymore till now...

Cooked for someone who isnt family or related to me last year...

Learn to see things with different color...

Getting rejected 5 times in a year... =__=

Self accident twice till my car's suspension dented.

Straightened my hair to get rid of my curls...

Went to Aussie for more than 2 weeks and enjoyed myself there a lot... chased kangaroos and stepped on their shit and brought it back to Kuching... got chased by a wild drake in Aussie...

Lose 10 kgs after learning to go gymming...

Learnt to wear dresses and skirts and high heels ever since i enter university...

Got my driver's license... really quick!!! =D

Own my own car... my blueyyyy...

And more stuffs to come, i hope in the future...

So after im 18, what else is there in store for me? I cannot guess right now... but i will just let all the chips fall into their places... wont i? Hehe...

Study info test tomorrow... ahhh... havent read through... major suicide... lol... tata then...

Haha... yalo... to my dear Kari... please dont tag me so many time la Darls... coz... coz... im down with flu and also i have lots of assignments to do... i have a test tomorrow and also on Saturday and next Tuesday... and you know im so goooooddddd to you so i wouldnt never say no to your tag kan? LOL... well... here goes the tag for you, Kari... ^^

List out 5 presents you wish for:
~ A teddy bear
~ A perfect birthday with friends... and dont create havoc that day, please? You know who you are... i want it to be a perfect sweet 18... lol... unless you surprise me la... LOLz... =__=
~ A new cheap phone to replace my other phone
~ Lots of money from parents on my birthday to go shopping!!!
~ Him... as usual... ^^

The person who tagged you is:
Karena Cheow Wei Wei... your full name right? LOL...

5 impressions of him/her:
~ HOT!!!
~ blur queen
~ likes to bully orang yang lebih tua daripada dia...
~ camwhore addict
~ very funny... haha

If he/she is your lover, you will:
Go and camwhore with her every second, minute, hour, day, year, eternity... LOL

If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be:
~ Her boobs becomes so much bigger than mine that i will die of jealousy... =P

Pass the quiz to 5 people you wish to know how they feel about you:
Erm... i dont wanna tag anyone... erm... maybe a few la... i tag Chin Fong and Ropa... LOL... ^^

End.

Okay... now back to Malaysian Studies and tissues... sighs

I have a thick outer ego, which always is bitter and bland... meaningless... some good things never penetrate through... thats why i never learn from my mistakes... bitter memories will always remain bitter, sad memories will always remain, hatred and resent always exist... i cant seem to forget things easily... i hate this... i hate my thick layer of undulating fat...

My middle layer... a pure white, innocent layer, which is like a piece of white cloth. Its like a baby who just learnt its first few steps in this world... throw in anything, and it will be influenced and remembered for the rest of their lives... nothing seems to be able to penetrate through to reach this layer... its too clear... i never learn anything which is much of use... i only learn pain...

My inner layer... black and hollow... sweet but emo... a taste of this is like sugar crystals popping the moment it touches the tongue. Ive always hid myself inside... where no one but close friends seem to get the tendency to manage to reach to this sweet but dangerous layer... if left untouched, it will forever remain sweet... but once shaken or stirred... its a blend of tastebuds tingling and hence, you need to be ready for the aftermath...

So if all these three layers are stirred to become one... am i gonna be a better person in life? I hope so... i dont want my pride to get the better of me again... i dont want to hate someone who doesnt deserve it, coz its all my mistake in the first place... i want to escape from the black abyss which engulfs my life... can i do that? Only God knows... Only HE knows...

In Berberboo's mind: Nothing like a sweet speck on my cheeks may cure this remedy for disaster...

I cant find the reason to smile anymore...

I was so freaking hungry after a 3 hours exercise yesterday that i decided to eat my dinner a wee bit earlier than usual, that is at 6 pm. Usually i have my dinner about 7.30 or 8 pm but since i hadnt had lunch... i almost died of hunger pang. LOL. So my family and i went to a coffee shop, erm... whats it called... Lee Coffee Shop or something like that opposite the un-open market at Tabuan Laru. The place hasnt opened fully when we were there but hell the food available is enough to fill my stomach. So yea, i ordered Kolok Mee, although im no big fan of it, the ones made at this shop is extremely tasty... wanna know why? COZ THEY HAVE FRIED PORK SKIN which added flavor to the noodles. ^^ Yummylicious~~~ i didnt take a photo of it, but i will when i go over there again. So while eating... i spot a shop that hasnt open... and guess what?

SATAY BABI!!! hahahahaha... i never knew they had pork satay in Kuching before... huhu... i was so tempted to wait there till all the stalls open then i can order pork satay... but then... needa go home la... dad was sick... sighs...

But then, my bro and i was damn hungry at 10 pm... so he and mum went back there to tapao some food to eat again... wahahahhaa... damn piggy arent we?


PORK SATAY!!! very very juicy and yummy!!! the stall is operated by Chinese and yea... the peanut sauce wasnt that spicy... sigh... but the satays were good... ^^


Fried Char Kueh. Quite yummy... except not as dry as the one in Tabuan Jaya.

So my verdict of that coffee shop? Kolok mee a must try, char kueh tiaw is so so but damn cheap for a large amount, porridge too lumpy, char kueh is ok, and pork satay is good!!! Go there and try some days... but then gotta warn you... very hard to find place to sit at night... shit...

Go there for supper... its worth it!!! ^^

In Berberboo's mind: Gah, my right hand is shaking badly after 3 hours of exercising... shit... =__=

Buh... i got tagged by Kari... and and... since its the year 2008 and i have not many ideas on what to blog these few days... gah... just do the tag to keep myself out of boredom... so yea... here's the tag:

2007 Review Tags:

1. Happiest moment:
When i thought of how much i meant to you... even though you dont say it... i know... actions speak louder than words... lol...

2. Saddest moment:
So many lar... erm... let me see... got rejected 5 times... LOL...

3. The most memorable moment:
When you told me you would have given me the world, if only i changed... and... GETTING MY DRIVER'S LICENSE FOR THE FIRST TIME!!!

5. Things that you've learn this year:
- Do not be so bold and tell a guy what they meant to you... it will scare them away
- Honesty is the best policy... dont tell lies
- You cant take back what you have said... if not, you are considered indecisive and lying...
- Do not be used by those people who only befriended you for benefits
- Never tell a guy you love him... just say you like him... coz love doesnt mean anything at this stage

6. Weirdest thing:
I grow thinner... xD

7. The most unforgettable thing you saw:
My grandmother's corpse...

8. The fact that you have finally accepted/agreed:
No matter how much you change, no matter what you do, no matter how much effort you put in, if someone doesnt like you, he will forever never have feelings for you.

9. Best event:
Getting my SPM results... and seeing old friends there... ^^


11. Things that i hope to achieve in 2008:
Not resolution right? LOL... erm
- still want a boyfriend
- pass all subjects with flying colors
- tint my car
- lose weight... again...
- get a teddy bear for my birthday... sshhh...

12. 5 things you sincerely hope that will be a reality in 2008:
- none of my friends leave my side no matter what...
- boyfriend
- dont be a desperate bitch
- dont change too much
- love myself as much as i love my friends... ^^

And i dont wanna tag anybody... unless they are free to do this... =D

What a good way to start off a 2008 post - FOOD!!! Glorious food!!! AHHH... You cant deny i love food, and im not gonna deny that i love pigging myself too. So yeah... ok, i admit i didnt have those luxurious food these few days coz im broke. LOL... But anyways, normal food will do right?

To start off... HECK I DIDNT KNOW MADAM TANG'S MOVED FROM JALAN PETANAK TO THE SHOPLOTS SOMEWHERE OUTSIDE MY HOUSE!!! Ngek ngek... everyone's been to Madam Tang's at Petanak's, thats what i can assume since people say they serve the good Sarawak Laksa and beef noodle. So since its near my house now, i cant say no but made my virgin trip there yesterday before heading to the gym after that. Had Laksa with my brother, and i forgot to snap any pictures coz... erm... i totally forgotten about blogging. The Laksa was pretty good i can say. Very flavorful gravy. ^^ Bill for two amounted to 13 bucks coz bro had the huge one. So i guess its pretty pricey, but its worth it. Then headed off to the gym... then came back for beef noodles... AT THE SAME PLACE AGAIN!!! The Ah Gua at the shop there was laughing at us. Dang these Ah Guas!!!


The beef kueh tiaw... damn good... especially the beef and its tendon and stomach... very tender and juicy... AHHH... I WANT SOME MORE!!! The one above is frigging huge and it cost RM6.80. Ok la...

So after eating my late lunch... i went to sleep coz i was damn exhausted... then needed to go to class at 5.30 pm. Shit... but oh wells, my bro had some gathering with friends and parents went to spend some time alone outside since i had class... so i was pretty much gonna be alone if i head home after class. Dang~~~

But nevermind, Shawn and Siaw Yin decided to go to Jalan Song for dinner, and yea, i tagged along... hehe... went to Pizza Hut. Huhu...


My spaghetti bolognese and meatballs... i always love their sauce... ^^


And some foldover pancake crap under Mexican what shit... couldnt remember the name. But it was frigging spicy... you pant like a dog before you can taste the real flavor... thats why... not recommended...

And for the pizzas.... no pics coz i bet you know how Pizza Hut's pizzas look like right?

So nevermind, the 3 of us ate 4 person share coz Jasmine couldnt come. So anyways, eat till bloated... came home and uwekkkk everything out. Haha.

Spent the whole night chatting with someone... thanks ya... i appreciate that. And you're the first who wished me Happy New Year too... counted down with me. Haha, cute.

So this morning... i woke up at 11.30 am. WAHAHAHA... im so pigged!!! Mum bought kon pia to eat for breakfast but i had them during brunch... and with pork soup that Michael suggested. And guess what, not bad eh? ^^ Thanks for the idea.


Damn... i wanna go to Sibu for the real deal. Sighs... Dont they look good? ^^

Gah... and im eating non stop ever since... i hope i dont put on weight... coz thats NOT IN my New Year's Resolution...

I spent the evening of New Year... WASHING MY HOUSE'S LONGKANG!!! and i blistered my palms from all that scrubbing... =__= i cant even hold a pen now... sigh...

And shit... New year is playing with me again... im being overly happy about something... which i shouldnt have. Crap... AMBER... THINK OTHERWISE!!! Buh...

In Berberboo's mind: 13 more days till im legal... shit... im old...